no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
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