dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
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