I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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