She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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