HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
