Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
