So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Randomize
