Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
