I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
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