Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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