Is it normal to miss your booty call?
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
My dick has a subreddit
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize
