the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
