I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
