I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
We named our party play list daddy issues
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
My feet surprised me
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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