i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
How many fucks given?
0.12846
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
PANTIES FOUND
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