If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
