I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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