She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Randomize
