i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
