try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
There are leaves in my underwear?
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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