That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
