Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
