You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
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