So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
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