Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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