Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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