no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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