So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
