You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
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