It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize
