I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
