i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
