I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize