yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
