i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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