please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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