All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
