i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
