I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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