Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
