There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
