Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Randomize
