I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize