so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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