that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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