those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
wow bdsm is so cute
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
