I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
