Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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