It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Randomize