is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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