a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
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